Friends

To Regret or Not To Regret?

/ Sloan / 2 Comments

One week from this moment I will be boarding a plane to Thailand. Well, no, not true-I’ll be boarding a plane to LAX, then to Hong Kong, THEN and only then will I be getting on a plane to Thailand. But you know what I mean.

People keep asking me what I’m going to miss most. Ya know, I have no idea—as much as I love my job, my community, my friends, my trails and my life here in Southern Oregon I think I’m ready to discover something really new and most definitely exciting. I’ve lived a lot of my life not wanting to miss out on anything. Being too afraid to leave and really follow what I’ve dreamed of doing, what I have discovered is that by leaving, or by not leaving I miss out on a whole lot more.

I’m ready. I’m scared. But being excited is outweighing everything.

“You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island opportunities and look toward another land. There is no other land, there is no other life but this.” Henry David Thoreau

/ Sloan / Leave a comment

I should be writing as much as possible. I should be telling the world about all the amazing thoughts and travel ideas I have for this upcoming adventure to Thailand. But in reality, right now I am trying so hard to live ‘right now’. I am doing what I want. I’m going out for drinks mid-week to be with my friends as much as I can. I’m eating out (I never eat out,) I’m cuddling up on the couch with my roommates to watch a movie because who knows the next time I’ll be able to do that is?

I’m running. I ran for 2 hours through the woods with my friend on Sunday. We ran and talked about our lives. We didn’t talk about two weeks from now, not about 4 months from now when she leaves for South America, we talked about life and where we are. NOW. Now is enough right now. I ran again for 2 hours on Monday, why? Because I could, because I had time, and I had strength in my legs, because the woods were there calling my name.

Monday’s run was alone. I needed to see if I could do it on my own without the encouragement and the footprints of my friend to follow.  I did it, alone. I was there, at that moment loving on the mountains, wondering what the mountains of Thailand were going to be like—and then I dragged myself back to Ashland and reminded myself to just BE HERE. I am here for two more weeks, and I’m going to BE HERE for two more weeks; mind, body, and soul.

 

And then, only then am I off.

Fear-less?

/ Sloan / 3 Comments

A friend of mine said to me yesterday “There are two ways to live your life: live like your not afraid of anything and live like you are afraid of everything.” I don’t often disagree with this highly educated college professor, but after thinking about this statement for a while I do disagree. I’m living my life. I’m afraid and nervous and basically freaking out at each decision that I seem to be making—but I’m damn excited.

 

I’m living my life pretending I’m not afraid.

 

Keep moving forward