Author: Sloan

Let’s Talk

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You guys. I’ve slacked. I’ve been lazy and uninspired. I’m unable to travel at the moment, running through Chicago is not motivating to write about right now. I want to revamp, re-engage and re-up TheSoleSearch.com I literally just threw $26 back at WordPress to let me keep the domain name. So now I have some money down. Not a lot, but some.

And this should inspire me. I’m drinking coffee, in a coffee shop, I was up early and will be up late. These things should all be motivating to use my time wisely and get as much shit done in a day as possible. Time is precious and I’m not interested in wasting it away, not all of it anyway. I definitely just binge watched Stranger Things last night and that shit sucked me IN!

So if there are still any readers out there (hellllllooooooooooo?)  Stay tuned for some changes. I’m def still searching for my soul, via my souls, but I want to tell you guys about it in a new way. I want to take you on my journey and help you make your journey a little healthier.

In the meantime, let’s catch up! Find me on the InstaGram (@sloanderr) and snapchat (username: sloanderr). Warning, I’m not very good at snapchat, and it’s mostly selfies of me drinking coffee…

I’m also really available via email. I want to help you get fit, even if it means we’re working from across the country or globe! (hint…hint…of the revamp!) Email me: Sloan.PersonalTraining@gmail.com

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So. For the time being please be patient while I re familiarize myself with the internet, try to up my blogging game and get you some great information on how to be your best self! Because we all deserve to be the best.

So I did a thing…

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I apologize for my lack of blogging attention. Life has been INsane and I’m just trying to manage it all right now… good insane, just insane in general. But I wanted to pop on here and see if I could find some support from this community.

A few weeks ago I was working a race expo, (running race, where all the racer go to pickup their packet and get convinced to sign up for other races) yup, convinced to sign up for other races. That is what happened to me… Here’s a quick version of the story:

I went to the Girls on the Run table to talk about volunteer opportunities, and support a friend that was going to sign up to raise $1000 and run the Chicago Marathon to support this amazing program. If you’re interested in what it’s all about click HERE. Anyway, I volunteered for them for YEARS in college, it’s where I met one of my best friends, come to think of it–I got convinced into volunteering too, hmmmm, (ASHLEY!!!) Anyway, ten minutes later I’m picking what sized t-shirt I want to run in and being convinced that raising $1000 AND running a marathon is easy! ‘You have plenty of time, just train hard and ask for support!”

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So. That’s what I’m doing. Along with beginning my marathon training soon, I am asking for your support.  Please consider donating. Every dollar makes a difference. All of the support I raise goes directly to the girls that are unable to pay the full tuition fee for this AMAZING program–with the scholarships that become available because of this fundraising effort EVERY single girl can attend this after school, life changing program.

Click HERE to donate. Feel free to pass my message along to anyone you think would be interested in supporting me and the 1000’s of girls in Chicago that want to be a part of this self-positive, body-positive, confidence building program.

My deepest thanks for whatever you are able to help with. EVERY dollar helps.

Love,

Sloan

 

 

 

 

 

My Voice Is Valid, Damnit.

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I have always considered myself a girl with a loud and strong voice. Growing up I had an opinion about everything. Everything from what we were eating for dinner to not understanding why I wasn’t allowed to play tackle sports, like the boys were; I voiced what I thought no matter what. As I grew up my voice about women’s issues, politics, gay rights, environmentalism all got stronger. The voice about what I want for dinner and which movie to watch began to get smaller. That was okay–I typically felt and feel indifferent about those things. Or if not indifferent I felt that I could deal with whatever choice was made because I didn’t and don’t want to make the wrong choice and upset someone else.

Recently I’ve been put in the position where I have to ask for what I need. It seems like it should be easy. You have a need from a source that is supposed to be giving you that need and you ask for it. You ask for what you need. Simple. Period. Simple. So why am I struggling with this?

My friend Nikki Nigl is a huge proponent of the term “My voice is valid”. She makes a living by reminding women this fact. So why do so many of us battle with this? Why am I sitting at a coffee shop binge drinking my favorite dark roast anxiously awaiting a response to an email I just wrote. An email where I stated facts that I believed to be true about what I was told I was to receive and what I actually need?

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Where did my self supporting voice go? Where did that little 9 year old girl with red cheeks, tears spilling over and a voice so sure of herself end up? Memories of tears, and plea’s, and absolute absolutes that I needed to have this or that toy or adventure, where did that go? Did I use all of it up? Is there a finite amount of confidence we’re allotted and I just used mine up before I became a teenager?

I still have a voice. I know that this voice can be loud and proud and angry. I get tears of frustration and anger that well up in my eyes when I hear on the news that my lesbian or gay friends could be fired for being who they are, I give a small amount of money to the Human Rights Campaign monthly to have a voice and support it. I call bullshit when Planned Parenthood’s funds are threatened and will fight tooth and bone with anyone for women’s right to chose. I also find myself defending co-workers and friends to people starting rumors and talking crap.

But ask me to stand up for what I need and I crumble. I sit in therapy for an hour and half and talk about how XXX isn’t working for me. I’m not getting what I was told I would get and I cower, hide and cry. I cry because I’m scared to say what I need. I cry because I’m afraid of how I’ll make the other person feel. I cry because I don’t want to be attacked and made to feel wrong. I don’t cry out of passion and stand up and shout what I need. I cry and curl up and whisper I don’t want to rock the boat and cause issues. 

Nine year old me is unimpressed. 29 year old me is frustrated and working on it.