Author: Sloan

A New Definition on Necessity

/ Sloan / 2 Comments

I’m having a hard time connecting. I remember in college going shopping and finding cute clothes that I wanted, trying them on, buying them, loving them for the shear idea that they were cute. A new purse, earrings, jeans…etc., all of these things didn’t mean anything to me besides the fact that they fit, they looked nice or they accessorized my life a bit more. I’ve lost that.

            Recently, I truly only buy most things out of necessity. Well, I mean, necessity used in a loosely translated way—I suppose I don’t absolutely need a new candle or book, but both of these things brighten my day and help me pass the time with out turning on the television, helps me learn, and makes my room smell delicious. So necessity is what I buy for.

            I’ve been on the hunt for a new purse lately. I have one great, leather purse that I bought in Chiang Mai, Thailand. I love it. I cherish it, it’s something that I will literally have forever. I met the man that sewed it together and hand picked the hardware that goes so perfectly with the construction. This bag has a story. When I go to the store, the mall, Target, I don’t feel anything when I see the bags there. I see them as cheap, wrinkly, pieces of fabric that won’t do anything for me. So I wander the earring section—looking for a new pair of dangly earrings that might give me that bit of rush because of that instant, quick purchase. All I end up seeing are pieces of plastic that realistically, make me kind of sad sitting there on the shelf.

            The earrings that I bought in Vietnam were hand made by a tribes woman’s father. I spent all day with this woman. They wear the same pairs that I bought from their hands. The bracelet I wear (and haven’t taken off since) was given to me by the same hilltribe woman in Sapa, Vietnam, same with my ring. These pieces of jewelry have soul, have memories. They have stories. Even my silly costume jewelry has a memory of wandering Kao San Road at midnight while I dodged tourist eating fried scorpions and I haggle with the shopkeepers in broken Thai.

 

I’m down to necessity and stories. But even, the word necessity is being stretched. I like having little. And the little that I have have stories that I love to tell.

 

 

 

Necessity: wanting or needing something that will make your life a bit easier, more comfortable, fun or exciting.

            Example: a new book, some lush lotion or a new sports bra in a fun color.

A lovely smelling candle while I read my book is a necessity.

 

 ImageBelow: Thai costume jewelry. Above: Vietnamese ring

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Personification of a Verb

/ Sloan / Leave a comment

Change is sporadic, strange and often times annoying. He takes his own path, pops in when he feels like it and up roots your entire day, week, month, maybe year or even life!

You can’t prepare for Change, you can’t expect him to knock on your door at 4pm because he’ll more likely show up next Tuesday after you’ve gone to bed and have to get up early in the morning. Change doesn’t wait around. All you can do, all we can do, is embrace him. Embrace the fact that we can’t control him, he’s going to do what he wants when he wants. We can stop freaking out, we can stop having meltdowns and acknowledge that Change arrived a few minutes early, or two years later than we thought and we can wrap him in our arms, cuddle him and say okay, let’s do this, I’m not quite ready but I’ll never be, I’m glad you showed up.

 

[Here’s to Change. Here’s to opportunities. Here’s to going with the flow yet making shit happen.]

Finding, searching, processing…being

/ Sloan / Leave a comment

I’m finding myself lazy. I’m finding myself unable to move. I’m finding myself paralyzed with choice, the need to make decisions and figure things out. I’m finding myself more lost than ever…I’m finding myself saying that a lot.

 

I’m also finding myself really connected to inspirational quotes and those pretty images they are posted with on facebook. I’m finding myself reading Sera Beak’s The Red Book [A deliciously unorthodox approach to igniting your divine spark] I’m finding myself not rolling my eyes as much. I’m using phrases like “I think the universe is telling me…” and being completely serious. I’m looking for clues.

 

I’m laughing at myself when I fall over in my yoga practice, or after a full body workout when I can’t get off the floor—I laugh at myself, and then I laugh at myself for laughing at myself. It’s joyful.

I also cry. I cry when I can’t decide. Then I remember to rejoice because I have decisions to make and the ability to change them. I’m finding myself giving advice but not taking any—this needs to change. I talk a lot. I want to listen more. When I listen I need to absorb. When I absorb I need to put it into action.

 

Here’s to change. Here’s to listening to what, I think, the universe might be telling me. Here’s to covering my basis and doing research. Here’s to new adventures that will move me forward. Here’s to being scared, nervous, and afraid—here’s to relishing in life and being alive!

 

[more to come—processing]

 

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